Tuesday, August 31, 2004

doggy cute! 

Nil posted 1:07 AM

am i still alive?

Teachers' day rehearsal finally over... hahaha... i wrote 3 entries in a day... izzit scary??? Hahaha... dun care dun wanna care....

Today damn bloody pissesd off wif you-know-who... he tinks i dun hafta study... just wait for him to call me... really sux... but luckily... i saw some light after venting anger at my poor nice teacher Mr Tan... hahahha... he really very nice... nicer den you-know-who hundred thousand times... if i'm potter, i wld have kill him le....

hahaha... getting more violent by the day... hahhaa... butt today... my fren supprised me... he said somethng so horny i nv thought 'innocent' pple like him wld ever say... he told me if he did better den me for promos den i go sleep wif him on the same bed...

See... proves my point... guys are all horny... no guys are good... hahahaha... this is freaking sad... i'm writing nothing but woes and more woes... kill me someone... hahhaa

Nil posted 12:56 AM

am i still alive?

Monday, August 30, 2004

i have been wanting to ask this question since the day i knew my name what's the meaning of life? They all told me that a baby brings joy to the family but it is quite the opposite for me. I long to see smiles from my family smiles that came straight from the heart but i failed... i failed miserablely... all smiles and laughters were nothing but fake masks... sometimes i feel so close to my friends so close that i'm willing to give up my heart and my soul for them yet time has been cruel to prove me wrong and leave me in isolation no man is an island... yet an island i will be... for no one understands me... not even myself... i know not who i am i know not what i want... i'm but a zombie... waiting for time to pass and claim my life... the important thing in life is not about the end it is about the process... yet i find no meaning in going through with the process... sadness and depression... they will not take away my life but torture me day and night... i tried to run away but to no avail... shortest way out of pain is death yet i can't bear to leave this world... so suffer in silence i will may words be my power the power to bring me back to life... and stop this nightmare of mine... smile the whole world smiles with you cry you cry alone... how true this is.... for each time i reach out when i fall i find no one... no one to lend me a helping hand that will pull me out of my misery... so i learnt how to get back up by myself yet again I fell... and fell and fell... just like a bottomless pit.. i fell in the pit of depression... no one can help me... not if i do not allow... helping hands came but all too short to reach down below where i'm held... they tried and they tried... calling my name and giving support but all is too late... i have fell and broke my bones, my heart and my soul no one is able to get me back up... i'm nothing but a broken soul...

Nil posted 2:02 PM

am i still alive?

Today is just another sad day... woke up in the morning feeling very blue... izzit becoz of monday blues? I knoe not... half the time i wish to die yet i lack the courage to do so... friends asked me to cheer up and that things are not as bad as they seem.... but i feel sad... depressed... any negative words you can use on me... hahaha... been saying the words... 'wo xiang ku, ku bu chu, wo xiang xiao, xiao bu chu'.... felt like writing a long essay in chinese about my feelings and thoughts... nv thought i would feel this way... its getting worse since i grew up... year by year... i'm wondering when i will die... wondering what will happen if my loved ones leave me... eileen's mother had a brain tumor... and it got me worried... worried bout my mum... i noe death is inevitable... but i wish that it will never find my mum... pls oh pls... just let me die....so i dun hafta worried abt anything... let me in to heaven where i may find some comfort or just lead a happy life... a life without sorrow...

Nil posted 1:52 PM

am i still alive?

Sunday, August 29, 2004

cute cute cute! 

Nil posted 10:47 PM

am i still alive?

yoz... another day of my jc life... sux is the word i use... not the sch sux... not the CCAs sux... but the teacher sux... Note: I onli use teacher... coz onli 1 teacher is making my life miserable... Never thought I would cry dat day... but i did... and sort of supprised myself and my friends... hahaha... I feel like singing Jay's Wai Po... 'fo ding wo the zhuo ping... wo bu xu yao gai bian'... dat's the way i'm... if he doesn't like it so be it... but den again... dey always sae... if you can't change the world... change yourself... but i know not if i should change myself coz of one irritating basket ball... hahaha... and i tot no one wld make me feel so bad abt myself... dun wanna tink abt it any more... wat's worse... he dao me today... wth... if he really wanna do it dis way... i at most fight for my rights all the way and tell him i'm no push over!!!

Nil posted 9:37 PM

am i still alive?

necromancer

taggies @ the bottom! feel free to leave me a note

AboUt ME!!!

I'm a MartiaN living on Earth hence, my nick MOE! been here for 19 years nw, Earthling lifestyle suits me fine... main obj. on Earth is to learn all abt the species call Humans... and of course how to get along well with them... Have Earthling parents, and an Earthling sister who's a pain in e neck... Love my life here, 6 years of a pri. sch girl at Fuhua, 4 Yeas to call myself a CrEsCenTiAn, 2 years to PJC and another 3-4 years to come to b a NUS student... haha... Looking at what more this Earth can give this poor old martian... lolx...


Nata's loves

Nata has lotsa loves... haha... Nata loves to eat, drink and slp.... Reading comics is one of her fav. past time, nt forgetting being online... loves to hang out at GAS HAUS loCaTeD at MIDDLE RD wif Glen, Rach, Jon, Ben... Loves all her Frens esp. GlendA, JuliEt, Tse-Tse Fly, Phy, WakeY, Rach Lam, Connie, Ivy, Eddie, Gerald, Kee Onn, Robert... Loves all her Brothers: Shi Yang, Jeremy, Jonathan, Linus, Edward, John, Joseph Love her eye candy: Hong Seng... Love music by Jay Chou, Jacky Cheung, Zhang Xin Zhe.... Love her N6131... and... MOSt of ALL... Nata love her dear... Uncle Ben... :P

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