Friday, July 28, 2006
ok... pple may tink that I'm childish but I'm damned scared now...
i can feel someone behind me now... it's real...
i can feel like a hand touching my baq.... worse...
when i came home today... went to the bathrm in my mum's rm as usual...
i heard some funny noise.... nvm... den wash face and went to the dressing table...
Guess wat... IT WAS IN A MESS!!!! The table is soaked in solution and some tissues were thrown dere to like absorb the solution... when i screamed and asked if my sis did it... she said no... my mum oso said she din... and worse...
the solution dun smell like those we used at home...
instead.... it smelt like those *not discriminating* u spell on indians...
damned... i'm so afraid rite now...
the feeling of the hand behind my baq won't go away...
and as I'm typing now.... my rm has funny noises... very loud footsteps
dat has hardly shown itself in my rm....
arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
someone pls talk to me and save meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee......
i'm reali close to tears now...................
Nil posted 10:05 PM
am i still alive?
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Finally wanted to put some stupid photos i've taken during my working days...
most of it is my zi lian zhao...
Eddie and Me! though we know ea other not very long... but still I love her lots!
Ivy and Connie... so cute!
Ivy and ME!!!!! we look like couple together rite?!
Me... super lazy!!!
dun we look alike??
ok... tis one's special... I look super slim beside the gentleman rite... haha
my dear getting fatter le...
Nil posted 10:29 PM
am i still alive?
school's starting soon and I dunno why but keep on having tis feeling I'll be a loner... lolx... I tink i'm so used to working dat now dat i've stopped working it feels so weird... lolx... damned... i wanna work and earn money...
den again... i oso dunno wat i wanna study in Uni...
the criteria stated is making me confused coz i dun understand it at all..
time to get someone smarter than me to enlighten me...
ok... i know i've at least got to go for 4 modules ea belonging to diff. cat. of the fac... dat's all i noe... ok... here's wat I'm gonna do...
CNM... foundation to earn 4 cr...
JS... foundation to earn 4
EL... foundation to earn 4
and well...
i dunno wat to do le... lolx
mayb Psy... foundation to earn 4 cr...
yay... dat's all i noe...
haha
Nil posted 8:28 PM
am i still alive?
Sunday, July 23, 2006
been crazy about these songs lately..
they might not be new released songs but i love them nonetheless..
so shld write their lyrics here coz i feel they very meaningful...
if you like the lyrics too mayb u can consider listening to the songs...
lolx... it's all chinese songs :P
[情书] by 张学友
你瘦了憔悴得让我好心疼
有时候爱情比时间还残忍
把人变得盲目而奋不顾身
忘了爱要两个同样用心的人
你醉了脆弱得藏不住泪痕
我知道绝望比冬天还寒冷
你恨自己是个怕孤独的人
偏偏又爱上自由自私的灵魂
你带着它唯一写过的情书
想证明当初爱得并不糊涂
他曾为了你的逃离颓废痛苦
也为了破镜重圆抱着你哭
chorus:
哦可惜爱不是几滴眼泪几封情书哦---
这样的话也许有点残酷
等待着别人给幸福的人
往往过的都不怎么幸福
哦可惜爱不是忍着眼泪留着情书哦---
伤口清醒要比昏迷痛楚
紧闭着双眼又拖着错误
真爱来临时你要怎么留得住
Next song:
[好心分手] by 卢巧音;王力宏
女:是否很惊讶 讲不出说话
没错我是说 你想分手吗
曾给你驯服得 就像绵羊
何解会反咬你一下 你知吗
男:也许该分析 不应再说话
被放弃的我 应有此报吗
如果我曾是个坏牧羊人
能否再让我试一下 抱一下
女:回头望 伴你走 从来未曾幸福过
男:恨太多 没结果 往事憧憬是折磨
女:下半生陪着你 怀疑快乐已不多
男:被我伤 让你走
Chorus:
女:好心一早放开我 从头努力也坎坷 统统不要好过
男:为何唱着这个首歌 为怨恨而分手 问你是否原谅我
女:若注定有一点苦楚 不如自己亲手割破
男:回头吧 不要走 不要这样离开我
恨太多 没结果 往事憧憬是折磨
女:下半生陪着你 怀疑快乐也不多
没有心 别再拖
Chorus:
女:好心一早放开我 从头努力也坎坷 统统不要好过
男:为何唱着这个首歌 为怨恨而分手 问你是否原谅我
女:若勉强也分到不多 不如什么也摔破
男:好心分手没见过
女:可知歌者也耐好过 难堪就无谓再拖
好心一早放开我 从头努力也坎坷 统统不要好过
男:为何唱着这个首歌 为怨恨而分手 问你是否原谅我
女:若注定有一点苦楚 不如自己亲手割破
Nil posted 12:09 AM
am i still alive?
Saturday, July 22, 2006
haha... nata's finally going to write a happy post!!!!
Nata today made only a sale... bt it's over 200 plus profit
but decided to share wif Han han since he helped me get e goods...
lolx...
last day of work is coming soon!!! finally...
get to reali rest and enjoy my life...
the 1st thing i'm gonna do is to polish my piano...
tink my piano very poor thing...
nv get to b polished for a long time...
and of course... muz get pple to tune le...
haha... my poor piano...
played it today... Finally... n still love it the most
since it helps me destress...
i love my piano... coz whenever i tink too much...
my piano is e onli healing power i have in my hse...
i can juz do nothing and play my piano for hours though i have very little songs to play...
reali love it so...
wich made me feel like singing...
n i love it so...
the pple ask me how...
how i live to know...
i tell them i dunno...
i guess they understand...
how lonely life has been...
but life begins again...
the day it took my hands...
and yes i know...
how lonely life can be...
e shadows follow me...
the nite won't set me free..
bt i dun let these things get me down...
now that i'm in love wif it...
Nil posted 12:01 AM
am i still alive?
Sunday, July 09, 2006
[Negativity]
I always feel that negativity is a must in everyday life
for I've always believed in what is known as 'The Balance'
Only with negative thoughts can one truly see the beauty of positive thinking
Only with negative feelings can one feel the joy of happiness
Life is full of ups and downs.
Each turn brings wisdom to those who are brave enough to walk on
knowing the hardships ahead.
This is when one truly grows up, not physically but mentally.
A person who has his or her live in the bed of roses will never truly mature in his or her thinking.
Once he or she meets with an unfortunate incident, there could only be 2 outcome.
The first, is of course he/she could not bear the agony and chose to end it all.
The second, is to take things in his/her stride, learning to leave with the pain, and eventually emerge as a more beautiful and more fully bloom flower.
I have negative thoughts lately, too much of it actually.
Sometimes, too much for me to bear.
Tearing and telling myself...
When the going gets tough, the tough gets going...
telling myself... i've to hang on...
have to let myself grown into a much beautiful flower..
Nil posted 9:37 PM
am i still alive?
Monday, July 03, 2006
i'm growin up and learning more and more about myself...
i tink as i think thru ea day, i feel dat wat others said abt me is right...
rather what Glen said abt me is rite...
i'm too serious.... too serious abt how others feel...
i dun like others to be angry wif me...
seriously... i feel reali bad and sometimes, it makes me cry...
in this way, i'm a big cry baby i guess... lolx...
mayb to those who think is funny to play wif me and act angry wif me...
i tink you onli end up hurting me... haha...
coz these days, i cry alot... most of it is coz of work...
it's not dat i hate my job or anything...
i juz dun lyk it when it pple r angry.. coz of stupid things i do...
i'm slow and dense... lolx... so i end up doing things dat i shldn't do...
so when others r angry wif me or gif me a black face i feel reali sad and bad...
i feel like i'm always giving pple xtra work...
makes me reali stupid and stuff....
lolx.... haha.... school's starting soon... and well... i dunno wat 2 expect for sch...
as i'm growin up... i'm feeling isolated frm the human world...
mayb i'll end up as a loner wif no frens at all in my uni days...
been skipping jap lessons and making myself feel bad and wonderin how the hell can i pass my jap test on 2 aug...
lolx...
i'm wondering now wat am i doing...
been doin all the wrong things...
i dun even noe wat i'm doing is rite or wrong...
i got myself in tis relationship dat i'm not sure if it'll work out...
& i'm having bad feelings abt it...
lolx... mayb i shld turn into a lesbian...
i tink in dat way... i'll feel safe...
knowing dat i won't get hurt at all...
lolx...
Nil posted 8:47 PM
am i still alive?
